Guido in training

I know, it's a bad name but it's the only one I could think of that everyone will understand.

Let me set the scene. Monday night, 1800, suburban gym. I arrive and wonder why everyone was at the gym. Now I remember why I don't gym on monday nights.

As I walk the stairs to the gym area, I can hear them. The posers. The junkies. The muscle nuts. Oh dear god, why tonight of all nights?

Getting changed, there are 3 of them in the change rooms. Obviously 1 of them is brand new ("You'll be fine brother, just follow what we do and then mum will get off your back"). Wonderful, they'll transform another almost-human into a muscle bound fruitcake.

It's not that I have anything against people exercising, hell I enjoy the small amount of banter I have with my fellow gym memebers. Thing that bugs me about this type? They never come alone and always train together. Makes any machine or set of weights they use out of order until they have all gone through.

Case in point - Guido in Training - having 3 guys use the lat pulldown is fine. Having the same 3 guys chat between sets is just a little annoying.

Perhaps I'm being a little too overzealous here, I like to use the equipment but I accept that other people pay money as well to use the equipment. Perhaps it's just the ego boosting they all need to get from each other as they circle jerk themselves around the room to exercise.

And no, I'm not jealous I can't exercise with anyone else. Even a personal trainer gets me off my game.

I'm not really sure what it is, perhaps it was the interruption to my "schedule". The fact that they were training another one to enter the ranks. One things I know it wasn't, it wasn't jealousy. I end up yelling at people who try and spot for me. Well, only once and I did apologise afterwards.


Maybe it was just the fact that the stupid scales at the gym gave me the wrong numbers. No, that can't be it at all.


Damn scales. Fuckers.